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Monthly Archives: June 2011

Zach Xyzzy was, once pon a time, quite confident in his quacking xylophones.

However, it came to pass one day that his gargantuan army of spiders with their heads engorged to a frightful size could not quite keep up with the sad-sack sandwiches of his youth. Which is to say, Zach’s passion was gone. He released the spiders in a small Midwestern town, hardly even giggling at the pitiful amount of carnage presented to him. With that much pathetic inhibition, Zach’s xylophone project seemed immateral and jejune.

Zap-Quack. Zap-Quack. It was unfortunate that the machines ran on electricity. Had they only been constructed to feed off biological life-force, Zach might have had an army of musical man-eaters on his hands. As ’twere, he had nothing worth writing home about.

And so he died, without even a project that could sustain him for more than a few short paragraphs.